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Better Parents, Better Spouses, Better People by Daniel J. Siegel, Daniel Goleman

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Resolving Trauma and Loss

 

Siegel: The resolution of trauma or loss is a really important area. When we’ve experienced a loss or a trauma in our life, there is a massive disruption in the usual sense of reality that we have. I’ll give you an example. I worked with a little boy whose father died. For a year after the death, he seemed to be okay, but when Halloween came around, he fell apart. It turned out that he was having an imaginary relationship with his deceased father all the time, who used to walk him around on Halloween. When Halloween was actually coming he realized that there was no father and he started, literally, just fragmenting. That would be an example, since its lasted for a year, of at least delayed grief. If it had gone on longer ...

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