HBR Working Moms Collection (6 Books)

15

How to Talk to Yourself with Compassion

by Alice Boyes

Quick Takes

• Give yourself a gentle and supportive nudge by asking what you need in this moment
• Use irreverence to challenge your beliefs
• Reframe a trait or tendency to take a more balanced view
• Identify your patterns of self-sabotage
• Borrow language from friends, quotes, or proverbs
• Write scripts for common scenarios

Often, we’re our own worst critic. When we feel anxious or frustrated, we talk to ourselves more harshly than we’d find acceptable from anyone else. I blew that presentation. Everyone on my team has such strong technical skills; I can’t follow the conversation. My kiddo is going to be so mad at me for working late again. We wrongly assume that criticism will motivate us ...