You're trying to help--but is it working?
Helping others is a good thing. Often, as a leader, manager, doctor, teacher, or coach, it's central to your job. But even the most well-intentioned efforts to help others can be undermined by a simple truth: We almost always focus on trying to "fix" people, correcting problems or filling the gaps between where they are and where we think they should be. Unfortunately, this doesn't work well, if at all, to inspire sustained learning or positive change.
There's a better way. In this powerful, practical book, emotional intelligence expert Richard Boyatzis and Weatherhead School of Management colleagues Melvin Smith and Ellen Van Oosten present a clear and hopeful message. The way to help someone learn and change, they say, cannot be focused primarily on fixing problems, but instead must connect to that person's positive vision of themselves or an inspiring dream or goal they've long held. This is what great coaches do--they know that people draw energy from their visions and dreams, and that same energy sustains their efforts to change, even through difficult times. In contrast, problem-centered approaches trigger physiological responses that make a person defensive and less open to new ideas.
The authors use rich and moving real-life stories, as well as decades of original research, to show how this distinctively positive mode of coaching—what they call "coaching with compassion"--opens people up to thinking creatively and helps them to learn and grow in meaningful and sustainable ways.
Filled with probing questions and exercises that encourage self-reflection, Helping People Change will forever alter the way all of us think about and practice what we do when we try to help.
Table of contents
- Title Page
- 1. the heart of helping: how to really help others learn and grow
- 2. conversations that inspire: discovering what is most important
- 3. coaching with compassion: inspiring sustained, desired change
- 4. awakening the desire to change: questions that spark joy, gratitude, and curiosity
- 5. survive and thrive: the battle in your brain
- 6. the power of a personal vision: dreams, not just goals
- 7. cultivating a resonant relationship: listen beyond what you hear
- 8. creating a culture of coaching or helping: pathways to transform the organization
- 9. recognizing coachable moments: seize the opportunity
- 10. the call of compassion: an invitation to dream
- ABOUT THE AUTHORS
- Title: Helping People Change
- Release date: August 2019
- Publisher(s): Harvard Business Review Press
- ISBN: 9781633696570
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