4.   Engage the Person

When you meet with the angry individual, remember that your primary task is to listen. Let the angry person express the anger in his or her own words. Listen carefully and actively, but don’t interrupt. Guide the discussion only when necessary, and use neutral but probing questions such as “How?,” “Why?,” and “Can you be more specific?” Try to gather more data from the anger. Throughout the meeting, exhibit respect, sensitivity, open-mindedness, flexibility, and tolerance.

Sometimes angry people simply want to vent their anger to another person—especially a person in a position of authority. If the angry individual wants to vent, remember two important facts:

•   Venting anger does not relieve angry feelings and sometimes ...

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