Noise

Chapter 15Present Listening: A Gift Worth Giving Now

Few people know how to listen well, or even care to learn. It’s tough on so many fronts. We’re super busy, generally distracted, and more concerned about our own thoughts, perspectives, and plans. Who has the time and mental energy to listen actively and deeply to someone else?

It’s draining to listen.

Yet, it gives you power to reveal hidden insights, deepen understanding, and build stronger connections. Think of the people you know who are gifted listeners. Do you know more than five of them? Probably not. What stands out when you’re in a conversation with any one of them? How does it feel? What are their secrets?

The term present listening is my intentional play on words. It means both that you are in the moment—not racing ahead or looking back, but in the here and now—and giving your listening as a gift, not expecting anything in return, with little to no agenda.

Present listeners have a power to lower the noise and get themselves, and others, to tune in.

While developing our workshops at The BRIEF Lab, my initial focus was developing a curriculum on becoming a concise communicator. Over time, however, the value of listening as a core skill of any effective communicator emerged like a bubble to the surface. Truth be told, I had little to add because I wasn’t a strong listener. Though I had my moments, active listening was not a strength at the time. My late brother, Johnny, who also taught classes with me, was an exceptional ...