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Talk Less, Say More: Three Habits to Influence Others and Make Things Happen by Connie Dieken

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Part I. 10 SIGNS YOU MAY BE A WEAK CONNECTOR

Do You Do This?

  • 1 You have trouble getting people to listen to you, pay attention to your ideas, or return phone calls or e-mails.

    ISSUE: CONNECTING ESSENTIALS

    FIND HELP: page 11

  • 2 You're impatient, easily distracted, or often multitask while communicating.

    Are You a Weak Connector?

    ISSUE: STAY IN THEIR MOMENT—STAY RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW

    FIND HELP: page 19

  • 3 You don't listen well, interrupt frequently, dominate discussions, or start most conversations with what matters most to you.

    ISSUE: STAY IN THEIR MOMENT—LISTEN FOR INTENT

    FIND HELP: page 21

  • 4 You're preoccupied with how others may be judging you.

    ISSUE: STAY IN THEIR MOMENT—AVOID CODE RED

    FIND HELP: page 23

  • 5 You frequently ramble, take too long to get to the point, or have been told that you're dull or boring.

    ISSUE: FRONTLOAD—NAIL THE BIG IDEA

    FIND HELP: page 31

  • 6 You automatically use the same method of communication to reach everyone—the method that you prefer.

    ISSUE: FRONTLOAD—CHOOSE THEIR PREFERRED METHOD OF COMMUNICATION (PMOC)

    FIND HELP: page 34

  • 7 You're not good at reading people's body language, or you have trouble reading between the lines of what they say.

    ISSUE: FRONTLOAD—DEFUSE DEFENSIVENESS

    FIND HELP: page 37

  • 8 You're often judgmental or critical of others in public.

    ISSUE: GOLDILOCKS CANDOR—DON'T DEMORALIZE

    FIND HELP: page 47

  • 9 You sugarcoat, sidestep, or hold back to avoid conflict or criticism.

    ISSUE: GOLDILOCKS CANDOR—DON'T SUGARCOAT

    FIND HELP: page 49

  • 10 People don't share honest, timely feedback ...

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