The Invisible Game

Chapter 9Expand Your Comfort Zone

For all the talk in negotiations about getting to ‘yes,’ the word ‘no’ may be the most valuable word any salesperson will say in the course of a negotiation.¹ This has tactical as well strategic implications. In line with their training, most buyers follow the same general playbook that encourages them to push for more and more concessions – price or otherwise – until they finally hear the salesperson utter the word ‘no’. In their playbook, only the seller's ‘No!’ marks the end of a negotiation.

It would be easy to offer a platitude of ‘just say no’ as a recommendation, but that would be identical to telling a frightened person to simply stop being afraid. Such suggestions are not practical advice, no matter how well intended they may be. If ‘no’ seems to cross your lips with conviction, but your body – through sweat, lack of eye contact, a catch in your voice, or any other subtle gesture – betrays you, then you have probably made matters worse, not better.

Changing a dominant response is a journey of self-improvement. In the world of sales negotiation, our narrow focus is to make ‘no’ your dominant response when a buyer requests a concession, and to ensure that you deliver that ‘no’ comfortably, confidently, and consistently. The process we describe and explain in this chapter applies to any situation when someone would like to change and then reinforce a new dominant response.

There is a lot of truth to the old saying that the only human ...