The Parental Leave Playbook

Chapter TenTouchpoint 6 Advocate

SO OFTEN, OUR default as new parents is to make sure we take care of our family and work commitments first. Although these are important, if we don't take time to also care for ourselves, our capacity to show up for others is unsustainable. If self-advocacy has been a weak point for you in the past (this may have surfaced as a liability during your 6-S assessment back in Chapter 5), know that parenthood will present many opportunities to work on this skill. Look through your assets and see if there are any that would help your advocacy efforts. For example, if you have supportive coworkers, perhaps you could enlist them to go to bat for you with your supervisor.

Advocate sits in Phase 2 because you will be doing lots of advocating for yourself in real time as you welcome your child—at work, at home, and potentially with your health care team. Read this chapter before your child arrives for maximum benefit in applying advocacy to all phases of your transition and beyond.

Self-advocacy is about understanding your responsibilities and needs, then managing those responsibilities and protecting those needs in the face of external pressures by developing healthy boundaries. As a new parent, you will also frequently need to advocate on behalf of others, including your child(ren) and family members. If you find it easier to advocate for anyone other than yourself, that protective instinct is normal and admirable; just remember that you serve the ones ...