CHAPTER 3Reclaim Your Seat: Reaching the Top Is Not as Difficult as Staying There
Success is not measured by the position one has reached in life, rather by the obstacles one overcomes while trying to succeed.
—Booker T. Washington
It was January 2018. I just accepted the position of chief operating officer at the largest health insurance company in New York. I was 35 years old. I had never made more money in my life. I was earning more than four times my parents’ income combined. But they did not understand how to react. They were uncomfortable and even anxious. Both my mother and father were unsure whether they should be overjoyed or fearful for my future. Although they came to America to build a foundation for me, they could never have dreamed I would end up having a seat so close to the top. For them, this was akin to flying too close to the sun. They felt trepidation because my professional growth was quickly becoming disconnected from their own experiences and thus their tutelage. The fear within them was palpable. Because my parents had both faced real adversity like racism and financial hardships since coming to America, it was hard for them to fully understand how my achievements were possible in the same country that had essentially scorned them.
Often immigrant parents hold this baggage over their children in silence. Consequently, first-generation children carry this unspoken burden throughout their lives. Be smart, but not too smart. Get A's but don't become ...