As I settle into my seat in the back of the classroom, I can’t take my eyes off the perfect girl. She is the lead in every play, the soloist in every choir performance, and the winner of every writing award. Quite simply, she is the pride and joy of every teacher at the school. She also happens to be beautiful, and I am infatuated. I decide I’m going to talk to her after class. It’s sixth grade and I’m back in the public school system. A fresh start. A new, improved—and I hope, suaver—me.
“Is Scott Kaufman here?” the teacher asks. My trance is interrupted. Without hesitation I raise my hand. “Can you come sit up front please?” she requests. Confused, I pick up my backpack and move down, inching closer ...