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CHAPTER 16Facade versus Reality

“I masked who I was entirely. And I pretended I was someone who I wasn't. And I hid this person whom I am showing you today from the entire world, including the people closest to me in my family. So my wish is that I can encourage others to do this way before I did.”

—Melissa Bernstein, Co-founder/CEO, Melissa & Doug Toys

There's a saying that's been made popular over the past few years in this age of social media: don't compare your life to someone else's highlight reel. While this mindset may be trending now, the topic of facade versus reality is something I have been obsessed with from an early age. Likely, this obsession is the result of the optics of my parents' marriage and our family's place in the community. I often say I won the “parent lottery” because my parents are truly incredible people in so many respects. They are honest, caring, hardworking, patient, smart, and loving. Having their guidance and love is one of the luckiest aspects of my life. But their relationship, despite their attempt to keep it going for 29 years, had its issues, like any long marriage. What makes their situation a little different is that, when they decided to separate after my senior year of college, people in our town were shocked by the news. As I've grown older, I have learned not to be shocked by anything because you never know what's really happening behind closed doors. Growing up, however, I developed a keen eye for seeing how people's presentation ...