Break Your Own Rules: How to Change the Patterns of Thinking That Block Women's Paths to Power

What Were We Thinking?

Taking into account our biological role as nurturers and our propensity for collaboration, it's no surprise that we are willing to share the credit and play down our own accomplishments. In fact, if we feel inclined to discount our accomplishments, as the Old Rules indicate, being modest may be due to self-preservation.

In their book Through the Labyrinth, Alice Eagly and Linda Carli say that “people may accept boastfulness in men but, as demonstrated by several studies, they more often dislike boastful women.… As a result, self-promoting women risk having less influence than women who are more modest, even though people who self-promote are considered more competent.”1

It's a classic Catch-22 predicament. If we aggressively ...