Chapter 3. Does it entertain?

Does it entertain?

You wake up to yet another perfect morning. It's 72 degrees and sunny ... just like yesterday. And the day before that. And the (insert any time period marker) before that. The birds are chirping, the flowers blooming, and the only thing blue is the sky. You get your perfectly temperatured cup o' joe and head out to your front porch to get the paper. The headline news of the day: "For The 763rd Day in a Row, Nothing Bad Has Happened." You smile as you wave to the newspaper kid as he delivers a perfect strike from his shiny new bike to the front porch of your neighbor, Dave. Funny, he wasn't even facing Dave's porch but the kid never misses. Dave's the perfect neighbor, by the way. Pulling from years of experience as both a Horticultural Artist and Recreational Vehicle Inventor, his hedges are always manicured perfectly and often in the shapes of fictional movie characters or brands of microbrews and he always seems to have an extra turbocharged, twin cam, solar-powered houseboat laying around that he'd love for you to use. Or just have, Lord knows he has another. Yep, this is your neighborhood, and it's fantastiglorious.

As you get dressed in your custom-designed Armani tank top and 12 and 3/8th sized Gucci sandals, you decide to go into town to pick up a few essentials: Some eggs, milk, a new set of diamond-milled irons and your own personal orbiting ...

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