Coaching with NLP For Dummies®

Splitting into Parts

In life, you split yourself into many parts. Some of the splitting happens within conscious awareness. Perhaps you already know a part of you likes a challenge, yet you may be less aware that another part gets troubled by conflict until this part of you becomes problematic because you don't like giving bad news to colleagues or feeling you haven't done the best possible job.

Splitting off part of yourself to the point where you ignore that part isn't successful. Danger lies in not honouring the value that one part contributes to the whole. As a coach, you're encouraging your clients to accept their whole selves without judgement and to acknowledge the disconnect between different parts as they work to find a coherent sense of identity. Your clients progress as they work to accept all aspects of themselves without judgement.

NLP suggests that these parts are non-integrated fragments of the client's whole mind. Each has its own purpose and function and presents different intentions that show up in behaviour. Often these fragments appear as if they're involuntary. You may hear your client say, ‘I don't know what came over me!’ or ‘That's not me talking.’ A part may take on the identity of a disapproving parent as in ‘That part was my father talking.’

Each part is likely to have its own beliefs and value system. Parts bring trouble when the behaviour of one part ...