7Agree on a Plan and Follow UpHow to Gain Commitment and Move to Action

Never grow a wishbone … where your backbone ought to be.

—CLEMENTINE PADDLEFORD

By now you’ve done a lot of work. You noted a violated expectation and decided to talk openly about the gap. You told yourself the whole story and took care to step up to the right issue. You then worked hard to deal with both motivation and ability issues. You even dealt with a new problem, used your bookmark, and then solved the original disappointment. Jointly, you found solutions that seemed promising. Good job!

But don’t exhale too quickly. The way you complete the interaction is as important as the way you start it. If you do this well, you build commitment and establish a foundation for ...

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