Energy Leadership, 2nd Edition

3Just Give It Six Months

Our role is not to teach [people] to think as we do but rather to teach them, by example, the importance of taking a stance that is rooted in rigorous engagement with the full range of ideas about a topic.

—bell hooks, author, feminist, and social activist

Richard was understandably distraught and obviously trying to keep a lid on his anger. “See what I have to deal with,” he grumbled.

When I did not respond immediately, he sighed, explaining that he had had enough for the day and needed some time alone. I said I understood and scheduled our next session for one week later, quickly adding that he could call me to talk about anything, including his dilemma with Don.

“Let me just say this before I go,” I offered. “I understand you're upset and that you feel the future is tenuous at best. Your company reflects who you are and what you want to achieve. It's normal for you to feel angry, unnerved, and maybe even depressed.”

Core Energy Technique

Validation

Validation is a technique you can use to help someone release anxiety and truly feel heard. Its main purpose is to normalize emotional responses. A perfect icebreaker, validating someone's emotions begins to shift the energy by letting the other person know they have the right to feel whatever emotions are present.

To do this, you must become aware that any emotional response is always normal. The response arises from whatever someone's experiencing at that moment. Responses are also linked to temperament, ...