Chapter 3

Giving Feedback That Sticks

by Ed Batista

“Can I give you some feedback?”

When you ask your employees this question, their heart rate and blood pressure are almost certain to increase, and they may experience other signs of stress as well. These are symptoms of a “threat response,” also known as “fight-or-flight”: a cascade of neurological and physiological events that impair the ability to process complex information and react thoughtfully. When people are in the grip of a threat response, they’re less capable of absorbing and applying your observations.

You’ve probably noticed this dynamic in feedback conversations that didn’t go as well as you’d hoped. Some people respond with explanations, defensiveness, or even hostility, while ...

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