Chapter 3

Say what you want and what you don’t want

‘Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.’

Dr Seuss

Anxiety, guilt, anger or fear of change; whatever the barriers, one of the main reasons you might find it difficult to say what you do and don’t want is that you just don’t know how.

Telling other people what you do and don’t want includes:

  • identifying how you feel
  • being clear and direct
  • listening and being open to other people’s views
  • accepting other people’s rights
  • identifying what the alternative ways forward might be
  • asserting your rights and setting boundaries and limits; what you will and will not accept
  • knowing when to compromise and negotiate and when to stand ...

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