How to Build a Business Others Want to Buy

Chapter 16How to manage an under-performing executive

‘We need to chat.’

These four words send shivers up the spine of middle management executives (and husbands) across the globe. The subtext is universally understood. It's code for, ‘I'm not very happy with you and I'm about to tell you why.’ Just hearing those words uttered can have a visceral impact on the body. We tense up, look for an escape and will say or do whatever it takes to get out of that situation.

If you need to ‘have a chat’ with someone about their underwhelming performance, don't kick off the conversation with those four words. It won't end well. So, how should you start a difficult conversation with a staff member?

How you frame it makes all the difference. Done poorly, the offending employee will take exception to the accusations and possibly seek legal advice from the Fair Work Commission, contact Consumer Affairs, or worse, A Current Affair, and make your life a costly nightmare.

Done well, the person will commit to improve their performance, or resign on the spot, with zero friction, say ‘sorry’ for being a bother and help you find a replacement. It's all in the way you start the conversation. For this method to succeed, you need to think like an army general: neutralise their defences, counter with curiosity and engage with empathy. It also requires you to take full responsibility for what happened. Whatever you do, don't attack. They'll get defensive, and when they get defensive, they stop listening. ...