How to Tell Anyone Anything

CHAPTER 12

How to Receive Feedback

So far we have spent a great deal of time examining how to say difficult things to other people as painlessly as possible. But what happens when people have difficult things to say to you? How do you react to them, and how do these discussions turn out?

Try an experiment sometime: Watch a political debate on television and pay attention to what happens when one candidate criticizes another one. In all likelihood, you will hear an exchange something like this:

CANDIDATE A: My opponent has never seen a tax increase she didn't like!CANDIDATE B: Actually, I fight for what the people want, unlike my opponent here who just wants to cut back all of your services!

Of course, neither of these candidates is exactly using ...