book

I Hear You

by Donny Ebenstein

December 2013

Intermediate to advanced

288 pages

6h 8m

English

AMACOM

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Becoming your Own Coach
Defining Stuck SituationsFixing it Begins with YouWhy Being Different Makes All the DifferenceWhat about Extreme People?Change what you SayChange how you Say ItBeyond the ConversationSummary
Changing your ThinkingDifferent Perspectives can CoexistFlexing your MindNow I See it DifferentlyWhat's the Magic Word?Shifting Perspective and Writing your Own Magic WordsSummary
Perspective is Practically InvisibleFreeing Yourself from Perspective IgnoranceActive ResistanceSummary

Difference of OpinionThe Role of CultureIdentifying Noncultural DifferencesDifferent and LegitimateMind the GapPractice Telling their StoryGuide to the Perplexed: Finding their StoryHaving the ConversationSeeing Isn't (Necessarily) BelievingSummary
What do I Sound like from the Outside?Simple, but not EasyDealing with DenialIt's not you, It's MeLearning about Myself—Going DeepLooking in the MirrorPracticing how to Look from the outside InHaving the ConversationWalking Down the RoadSummary
Systemic Conflict is Role-BasedCompeting IncentivesThe Benefits of Competing IncentivesHierarchyWorking for a SuperheroPersonalities within the SystemWho Cares?Why It's HardIdentifying your Systemic ConflictHaving the ConversationSummary
The ProblemHow can you Tell?AdviceHaving the ConversationSummary
What is Role-Playing?Role-Playing to Diagnose the ProblemRole-Playing to Look from the outside InRole-Playing to Tell their StoryRole-Playing to PracticeCreating your Own Role PlayStep One: Find a PartnerStep Two: Set the StageStep Three: Have the ConversationStep Four: Stop and DebriefStep Five: Try AgainSummary
Possibility 1: The Situation Gets Better and the Relationship ImprovesPossibility 2: Making Peace with the Status QuoPossibility 3: Walking AwayHave you Really Tried?Time to ActManaging RiskA Question of ValuesKeeping the Door OpenSummary

Content preview from I Hear You

CHAPTER 7 Don't Lose Yourself

MAINTAINING BALANCE

Edward and Helen were both sales representatives at an investment bank. Each received sales leads—names of prospective clients—from their manager, Maurice, and each was tasked with meeting with prospects and persuading them to invest with the firm. The sales reps were each compensated based on the number of new clients they closed, and, as such, the quality of the sales leads that each of them received was a major driver of their individual success.

Edward noticed that many of the best leads were being given to Helen. He raised the issue with Maurice, saying that he felt he was not getting his fair share of sales leads. Maurice listened to his concerns and promised that the next major lead would ...