Instant Interviews: 101 Ways to Get the Best Job of Your Life

Chapter 11. Dollaring for Instant Interest

Do you want an offeror to know you're a valuable asset? Send her a dollar bill!

Who does that? Clark Conventional? I don't think so. Clark Conventional spends half that on a stamp and twice that on a worry pill.

Here's how it's done.

Go to the Bank and Get 20 Crisp Dollar Bills

These will cost $20, so be prepared. The good news is that they cost no more than the funky ones in your wallet.

So, give George a facelift. Bad enough he's green and shrinking.

First impressions, you know.

Pick 20 Local Places Where You'd Like to Work

Let's say these are a music store, a recording studio, and a record label.

Working at these places would make you very happy because you love music. No boss, co-workers, or work could change that.

Only you're a brain surgeon. Even worse, you've got the shakes. So not fixing brains any more is a no-brainer. You can control it with pills, but not that well.

You go to a career counselor and take a battery of tests. You discover job incompatibility between brain surgery and working in a music store.

Job incompatibility is a careerfolk bigphrase that means, "You ain't done it, so you can't do it."

It's one example of how the fancy phrase becomes a new disease. Once you've got it, you need a cure. Only there's none because you're unqualified. Go find something else. How about watch repair?

This is why the whole job thing is so gross. You were in one box, and all that you can do is get into a smaller one.

My first question is, "What's this ...