CHAPTER 6Well-Intentioned Things White People Say That Are Hurtful or Offensive to Others

I was having dinner with my friend Quiana, and I had just started writing this book. I told her I was going to include a chapter that would tackle a list of what many well-meaning business leaders or executives say when the subject of race comes up at work. I couldn't even get past the first one on the list without her laughing her head off.

First on the list? “I don't see color.” Quiana, who is Black, laughed until tears were coming out of her eyes! She couldn't even talk for a minute because she was laughing so hard. It made me laugh too, and I asked her, “Really? THAT bad? THAT funny?” And she replied, “Oh heavens, YES! When was the last time you were talking to another White person and they looked at you and said, ‘I don't see color’? When I am talking to another Black person, we don't say to each other, ‘I don't see color’! Of course we see color! We all do! If you don't see color, then why are you mentioning it?”

Quiana is right. And she has also heard the line “I don't see color” more times than she can count. It doesn't ring true because it isn't true.

People mean well. They have good intentions when it comes to diversifying their team at work. But they often say things that are untrue, weird, totally off-base, or actually offensive (unintentionally). Here are common statements that people often make when the subject of race or diversity comes up. They believe these comments are ...

Get It's Time to Talk about Race at Work now with the O’Reilly learning platform.

O’Reilly members experience books, live events, courses curated by job role, and more from O’Reilly and nearly 200 top publishers.