Lead Like You

CHAPTER 13Being ourselves in relationships

Life is all about relationships: the relationship we have with ourselves, the relationship we have with others, the relationship we have with money and material things, with our career, with nature, with life itself. Yet, for most of us, relationships are rarely simple. In this chapter, we will explore why they are important, why they can be filled with complexity and how we can show up more consciously and authentically in all of our relationships.

We are social creatures, and our need for connection and belonging is deeply ingrained in our nature. Connection supports our emotional wellbeing by fulfilling our emotional needs. It provides a sense of support, validation and understanding, which can help alleviate feelings of loneliness, anxiety and depression. Positive social interactions and relationships have been linked to greater life satisfaction and happiness.

Connection helps form our identity, as our identity is shaped, in part, by our relationships with others. Belonging to a group or community helps us establish a sense of who we are and provides a framework for our values, beliefs and behaviours — as long as we do so authentically and don't abandon ourselves to try to belong. We need to belong to ourselves first and foremost. Connection fulfils many of our inherent social needs, such as the need for companionship, intimacy and a sense of belonging. We seek out connections and relationships to satisfy these needs, as they ...