Leading with Empathy

Chapter 4The Power of Empathy

There is a profound difference between reducing pain and building happiness. Reducing pain is momentary; building happiness is persistent.

My mother was a strong and compassionate woman. She decided to become a doctor to help people, heal their pain, and make a difference in the world. She went above and beyond to help people and always said that she felt joy every time they felt relief from their pain or suffering. Her constant desire to give did take a toll on her personal life. She developed chronic rheumatoid arthritis early in her life, which flared up pretty badly at times. Her fingers and joints swelled up during those episodes, but she endured that pain with grit and tenacity. She did an excellent job of hiding her pain from us and always presented a cheerful exterior.

I was a teenager when her condition started worsening, and naturally rebelled at my mother's requests for help with household chores and assisting her with shopping. In my teenage mind, it was impacting my social time, my bonding with my friends, music, or my precious reading time. I am embarrassed to admit that I had many arguments with her on how she was diminishing my freedom and curtailing my social interactions. At that time, I did not try to understand why she was asking for help. It was all about me, and I felt like a victim.

Until one day, I walked into the kitchen and heard her softly sobbing while prepping for dinner. Alarmed, I asked her what was wrong. She quickly ...