Leading with Vulnerability

18Critical Moments

In chess there is a concept known as critical moments, which are positions in the game that can lead to either negative or positive turning points. It's important to be able to spot critical moments and to take extra time and care before playing the next move.

This same concept applies to leadership and vulnerability. Every leader will be faced with critical moments from a strategic business perspective, but in this case, specifically, when it comes to vulnerability.

In my research for this book, I discovered that leaders feel negative emotions and sensations when they are anticipating being vulnerable and even going through the act of being vulnerable. This can include preparing to have a difficult conversation, knowing you have to admit to a mistake or failure, or sharing something personal that is affecting your performance at work. It's an uncomfortable feeling associated with negative emotions.

When I asked CEOs about situations when they felt most vulnerable, I noticed something fascinating. There was always a fork in the road that led to three different outcomes: a break‐through moment, a learning moment, or a fixed moment (see Figure 18.1).

Figure 18.1 Three Outcomes of Vulnerability

Break‐Through Moment

We all go through difficult and stressful situations whether it is getting surgery, proposing to someone, asking for a raise at work, or confiding ...