Managing Up

13The Narcissist

“We have no patience with other people's vanity because it is offensive to our own.”

—François de La Rochefoucauld

 

Real‐Life Story

Charlie was excited about going to work for a newly elected government official. He knew that his new boss, David, had a reputation for having a very large ego; in fact, he was notorious for it. But he was also known to be charming, bold, and independent, someone who campaigned on making a difference. Charlie believed in David's mission and was honored to be a part of the team. That is until he actually started working there. As a former military person, Charlie was used to large egos and respect for authority and hierarchy. But what he witnessed working for David was something different altogether: “The office was chaos. Everybody ran around trying to appease David. There was no debate on policy or strategy. There was no speaking truth to power. It was all about stroking David's ego and puffing him up. Staff meetings were more about paying tribute to David than about how we were going to accomplish our agenda. I've never seen anything like it. It literally made me sick. Public service is supposed to be about the public and not the publican. I left after six months.”

 

One of the most dreaded and difficult bosses to deal with is the Narcissist. At first blush, the Narcissist often presents himself as charming, accomplished, charismatic, and confident, someone you'd love to follow. It's only after you are drawn into his ...