Me First

Mistake #1Imposter syndrome

You have been faking it, big time. You really have no idea what you are doing. And it is only a matter of time before someone comes up and taps you on the shoulder and quietly asks you to leave the room without making a scene.

Research is quite clear that imposter syndrome is more common in high achievers. Of course it is. As if we didn’t have enough to think about. Outwardly, we have all the trappings of success, but we are not able to internalise our successes. Our internal dialogue is one of self-doubt.

Social media — that glorious online world only a tap away where everyone, everyone, is perfect — does not help. But that’s the point: they are perfect because their profiles are stylised to be perfect. There is a significant lack of authenticity on social platforms. You do realise, don’t you, that you are comparing yourself to something that isn’t even real? Was there ever a greater waste of your time?

I have literally been winging motherhood from the day I found out I was pregnant 21 years ago. Am I a good mum? Will my kids have friends? Will my kids do drugs? Will my kids be good at sport? Will anyone play with them? Am I present enough? Are they happy? Am I setting the right boundaries? Am I a mum or a friend? Do other people think I’m a good mum? Do my kids think I’m a good mum? Am I a good mum?

There was a period of my life as a mum where hours of my time were spent with my kids in the emergency department at the local hospital. I think there ...