3Feeling Indebted: How to Build in Reciprocity and Concession

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EVERY YEAR at holiday time I agonize whether or not to send a holiday gift to Deidre. She’s been sending me the same box of cheese for 20 years. She lives in California. I live in Wisconsin. I’m surrounded by cheese. The last thing I need is a box of cheese. Often the box of cheese she sends is from a company in Wisconsin, which is ironic. Even more ironic is the fact that I started this chain of gift-giving. Deidre and I started off as business associates and then got to know each other as friends. One year I got caught up in the “spirit of the season” and sent her a holiday ...

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