Relationship Grit

Chapter 3 I = Invest

To have a great relationship you can't act like you are two separate teams. You must invest time and energy to become one team who supports and encourages each other.

Invest instead of Consume

(Jon)

In a marriage you can be a consumer or an investor. You can give or take from the marriage. I was a consumer in my marriage early on, taking what I needed for me and being upset when Kathryn needed me to give my time and energy.

But then I became more focused on being an investor. I was no longer looking outside my marriage. I was investing in it. And once I started investing in my marriage, everything improved.

I was still very busy with my restaurants. The first Moe's did really well, so we opened a few more since finding financial investors was easy. I was also speaking a lot, giving free talks around town to anyone who would have me speak. And I made time to write each week and continued to work on myself and feed myself with positivity each day.

But even with all that, I made time to become more involved as a husband and father. I was no longer an absent member of the family. Rather than considering my wife and kids a burden and liability, I realized they were an investment I needed to make. It wasn't a huge investment at this time; that would come later.

I was still very focused and driven to make my restaurants a success and become a writer and speaker, but my mind-set and perspective had shifted from consuming to investing. I was more self-aware ...