People hate to be sold but they love to buy.

—Jeffrey Gitomer

It’s true. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the truth is clear: Selling is for losers.

Why? Very simply, it’s because you’re, well, selling.

I define buying and selling differently than most people.

To me, buying is a pleasurable process where you happily exchange money for something you want or need.

Selling, on the other hand, is an uphill process of trying to convince someone that they want or need what you have. It’s all about overcoming objections, coercion, manipulation; I’m getting a headache just thinking about it!

Selling is a tough job and a losing battle. That’s why salespeople suck at it. Likewise, being sold is not enjoyable to a customer. That’s why people have built-in sales resistance, that’s automatically and unconsciously triggered at any attempt at selling them.

A while back, author Neil Strauss came out with a book called The Game (Harper Collins, 2005) about his experiences in spending a few years with an underground society of so-called “pickup artists” who essentially boiled dating down to a science. Having met Neil a long time ago at a marketing event, I couldn’t resist checking out the book, and it was interesting.

He tells the story of how women, who are approached by extremely attractive men they desire greatly, routinely reject them anyway—just because of how they approach the women!

In other words, they got rejected because they’re basically ...

Get Sales Badassery now with the O’Reilly learning platform.

O’Reilly members experience books, live events, courses curated by job role, and more from O’Reilly and nearly 200 top publishers.