Chapter 29
Paradoxes of the English Language
How Can a Wise Man and a Wise Guy Be Opposites?
Despite the fact that English is the “international language,” there is no denying that it is also a crazy language. This chapter looks at the humorous paradoxes, opposite meanings, exceptions, and sometimes just plain nonsense that English frequently serves up.
There is no egg in eggplant, nor is there ham in hamburger. There is neither apple nor pine in pineapple. And while no one knows for sure what is in a hotdog, you can be pretty sure it isn’t any kind of canine! English muffins were not invented in England, nor were French fries invented in France.
We take English for granted; however, if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand works slowly and that boxing “rings” are actually square. And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea, nor is it a pig!
A lot of the same questions come to mind when we look at plurals. If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth, beeth? If you have one goose and two geese, why don’t you have one moose and two meese? If there is one mouse and two mice and there is one louse and two lice, why isn’t there one house and two hice?
If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, can anyone tell me what a humanitarian eats?
Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital? Why do they have noses that run and feet that smell? Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do you get in and out ...
Get Say Anything to Anyone, Anywhere: 5 Keys To Successful Cross-Cultural Communication now with the O’Reilly learning platform.
O’Reilly members experience books, live events, courses curated by job role, and more from O’Reilly and nearly 200 top publishers.
