Scaling Conversations

CHAPTER 3Components of a Conversation

What constitutes a conversation? Certainly, we've all had countless conversations in our lives. You may well have had a dozen or more today alone. Or have you? A conversation is more than just sharing information or informing another person or group of people of a decision. A true conversation is a dialogue that employs openness, voice, listening and empathy, and shared understanding. To understand the value of a conversation—and a scaled conversation in particular—it's important to understand each component. Let me start with openness.

OPENNESS

To enter into a conversation that has the power to create trust, the first key element is openness. Everyone involved needs to feel everyone else is open and learning. If the conversation becomes a loud someone trying to convince you and everyone else of something they are dead set on, that can never be characterized as a conversation. That's more likely to be called a sales pitch, a rant, or worse, a lecture. But as soon as it's obvious everyone is willing and able to learn from one another, everyone will call that a conversation or a discussion.

So, what makes a conversation open? Many people think the way to ensure it is open is to begin with an open‐ended question. While that's true to a degree, there is another order of openness that is more important to start with: Intention.

Intention

Why are we having this conversation in the first place? What do we want to get out of it? What decisions ...