Do not read this book! Who bought it for you? was it your mom? An uncle? A friend? Oh, please do not tell me you bought it for yourself!?!

Let me guess, you were at your local bookstore, scanning the shelves for a REALLY great Newbury Award winning novel like Holes or The Giver or Bridge to Terabithia. If you have never heard of A Wrinkle in Time, you should throw this book across the room and go look the other one up under the author, Madeleine L’Engle, because it is AMAZING!

Maybe you were searching on for the Minecraft Red Stone book or a book about training dogs or learning street magic tricks and you mistyped a word or accidentally clicked something or … Please, oh please, tell me you were not looking for a book about Scratch! Seriously, I am a Scratch MASTER who literally wrote the book you are holding in your hands, and still reading, even though I told you to STOP READING!!! Do you think I became a Scratch Master by reading some stupid old book? No WAY!

Do you honestly believe the people at MIT who built Scratch thought, “Oh, we should make it really hard to learn so kids will need to buy books by old bald guys who like to use a lot of exclamation points in their introductions!”?


Well, if you ARE stuck with the book, if whoever bought it threw away the receipt or you are a compassionate person who wants to make sure I get paid for the hard (but ...

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