CHAPTER 2 Pathogenic Projects
“You may dispense with the pleasantries Commander, I am here to put you back on schedule.”
(Darth Vader)
Projects really are quite splendid things. Everybody loves them. Everybody wants one. Everybody wants to work on one. When new ones come along, the grey and drab world that IT people inhabit is suddenly transformed into a wondrous playground of excitement and opportunity. And as for size, in corporate life there's just one simple rule when it comes to projects—the bigger the better. You would be hard pressed to find any IT professional who wouldn't give their right arm to be involved in a really gargantuan project of epic proportions. Even Christmas1 has to work hard to match the joyous spirit in the office. Each new venture creates a sense of great occasion and it isn't long before grand words such as “Strategic Project” (which translates more accurately as “it is important and it is mine”) are bandied about the office. You may even hear of “Flagship Projects” which for some strange reason never have anything to do with flags or indeed ships. However, the ultimate goal in the IT project firmament is achieved after a clutch of tenuously related projects (or perhaps one ill-defined megalith), have ascended heavenwards and metamorphosed into what is known as an “initiative”. “Initiatives” represent IT project nirvana. An “initiative” is a corporate battering ram with the power of a Royal Train. All the signals will be green. Indeed if for some ...
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