Chapter 18

Ten Things an Introvert Doesn’t Want to Hear

In This Chapter

arrow Knowing why some comments alarm innies

arrow Coming up with helpful alternatives

If you’re an extrovert who hangs out with introverts, you probably try very hard to be innie-friendly. But sometimes it’s tricky, because the most innocent things you say can sometimes make them frown or even look at you in terror.

To offer some insight into the innie mindset, here’s a list of nice or seemingly harmless things that extroverted people often say to innies — along with the reasons they can backfire. In addition, I offer some alternatives that will keep your introvert smiling.

“We were just in the neighborhood and thought we’d drop in.”

Extroverts usually don’t mind unexpected company. But introverts do!

Innies see their homes as safe havens where they can escape from people and recharge their batteries alone or with their families. That doesn’t mean that they hate guests. However, they want to be forewarned if visitors are coming. And innies don’t like sudden changes in plans. If you ambush them when they’re looking forward to a cozy dinner or a quiet evening reading a book, they’ll put on a brave face — but underneath, they’ll be miserable.

So if a quick look of horror passes over the face ...

Get Success as an Introvert For Dummies now with the O’Reilly learning platform.

O’Reilly members experience live online training, plus books, videos, and digital content from nearly 200 publishers.