chapter 12

Digging Down to Disappointment

Dealing with Emotional PeopleWho Don’t Really MeanWhat They’re Saying

What I’M about to say may sound sexist. But hear me out, and maybe you’ll forgive me.

In most couples, one person often appears more logical—not to be confused with less crazy, but more on that later—and the other more emotional. Usually, the person who appears more logical is the man, while the person who appears more emotional is the woman.

Obviously, this isn’t always the case. But in three decades of working with couples, it’s a pattern I typically see.

So I’m not surprised when I wind up with a man sitting in my office with his mouth set in a grim line while a woman screams at him, “You’re just like my father!” or “You never ...

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