Tame the Primitive Brain: 28 Ways in 28 Days to Manage the Most Impulsive Behaviors at Work

Day 28

Expand Your Tribe

Global Village

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

—George Carlin

Today you’ll tame:

• Your old-world village mentality

Bruce’s friend Stephen had just retired from 30 years of teaching. They were in their favorite coffee shop, talking about retirement and life after work, when Stephen mentioned that he was thinking about teaching English in Asia for a couple of years. He had always wanted to travel, and this seemed like a great way to facilitate that.

Bruce mentioned that his daughter, Lauren, was teaching English as a Second Language (ESL) in South Korea, and happened to be home for a visit. Perhaps Stephen would like to chat with her about her experiences there? Stephen liked that idea, so Bruce asked Lauren to come over for lunch on a day Stephen could come as well. The lunch date arrived. Stephen showed up first. As the two men were chatting, Lauren came into the room.

Bruce was amazed to see Lauren greet Stephen as she would a long-lost friend—huge smile on her face, energy in her voice, and warm and welcoming body language.

Bruce recognized that Lauren clearly shared some values with Stephen around education and travel—they were “kindred spirits.” All the same, he thought, “I never do that, unless the person is a favorite relative or very close and well-loved friend.” Which got him to thinking further: “Perhaps Lauren’s tribe is a lot larger than ...