The Negotiation Book: Your Definitive Guide To Successful Negotiating

1.8. THE FOUR CHALLENGES WE FACE

1.8.1. Challenge 1 — This is all about you

Negotiation is uncomfortable. It sometimes involves silence, threats and consequences that many find difficult environments to perform well in. If you are to perform well, you will need to accept responsibility for your actions and recognise the significant difference your performance can make to every agreement you are involved in.

The art of negotiation can be learnt and applied, but you must have the self-motivation for change and the ability to be flexible. This is not just about being tough or being prepared. It is firstly about being motivated by the prospect of creating value and profit from well-thought-through agreements. You should therefore recognise that your past performance is no indication of your future performance, especially since every negotiation is unique, like every basketball or football game.

So, the first challenge is you. It is people who negotiate; not machines, or companies. We all have prejudices, values, likes and dislikes, preferences, pressures, objectives and judgement, as will the other party in your negotiations. So one part of our journey will involve understanding why our greatest challenge in negotiation is ourselves and how, by nature, we see the world from our perspective rather than that of the other party.

The simple process of an exploratory meeting, patience and seeking to work with someone, rather than to assume and then impose ideas on that person, is key ...