The Project Book

CHAPTER 22 MANAGE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS

Possibly the worst part of being a leader is that from time to time you have to manage a poorly performing team member or deal with a behavioural issue. In an ideal world, everyone will turn up for work, buoyed by the culture you’ve co-created, and will perform as agreed. They’ll get the work done, you’ll all get the recognition you deserve and you’ll sail away under clear skies, contentedly watching the sun go down over the horizon. Every now and then, though, an iceberg looms and if you don’t react quickly and appropriately, there’s the risk that your ship could be sunk. No more Leo, no more Kate, no more boat. Just a lot of people out in the cold.

Before getting to those difficult conversations, you first need to ensure that you yourself are not the problem and that you have set expectations in the right way (see previous chapter).

Once you’ve confirmed the source of the problem, you need to prepare for the conversation. Ask yourself the following questions:

• What is the issue?
• What will the other person see as the issue?
• What is the aim of your conversation?
• What is the risk to the project if the issue isn’t resolved?

It’s a good idea to ask the other person to prepare too, so they understand what the meeting will be about and won’t feel ‘hijacked’.

When preparing for a difficult conversation, it’s important not to rehearse a ‘speech’. I understand that this kind of preparation provides a level of confidence for some people, but ...