The Relationship Edge: The Key to Strategic Influence and Selling Success, Third Edition

Chapter 5. ASK THE QUESTIONS PROPERLY

Asking a good question is an art. It is often important to preface questions so the answers encourage meaningful dialogue. Asking the Link 20 questions in the last chapter as if you were filling out an opinion survey, however, will not build a positive business relationship. In many cases, you must request permission to ask the question. Good questions asked properly beg to be answered; bad questions elicit superficial answers. Good questions seek information honestly; bad questions seek data to serve a selfish purpose.

I believe we can promote good answers in two important ways:

1. The atmosphere of comfort and safety we create when we are with the other person.

2. The quality of our questions to further facilitate that safe feeling so the person wants to answer truthfully and candidly.

Indeed, the only way to have a genuine relationship is to be honest and open, to be truly curious, and to share information. This may sound very warm and fuzzy but not very practical. Does it do anything for the bottom line? Will it help a consultant or an accountant bring in more business? Will it help an employee in a matrix organization do the job? Will it help salespeople sell more?

In fact, it will.

If people trust your word and trust your intentions because they have learned over time that you are honest, open, and willing to share, they will be willing to work with you, to buy from you, to take your ideas into account. In time, you will move to the top of the Relationship ...