The Rules of Love

RULE 59

124

T H E R U L E S O F L O V E

Men like flowers too

Everyone knows that women like to be given flowers. And

chocolate. They’re classic gifts to show a woman that you love

her, and it’s not really about the flowers or the chocolate – lovely

though they may be – it’s the gesture that’s important. It’s the fact

that her partner cared enough to think of bringing her some-

thing to show for it.

So what’s wrong with reversing the tradition? Why shouldn’t

men get to enjoy these thoughtful little gifts too? We also like

flowers and chocolate too.

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We like anything that shows us that

you were thinking of us and wanted to let us know you love us.

And let’s not limit ourselves to flowers and chocolates. Giving

your partner a gift to show you love them is always a good thing

to do, even when it’s not a birthday or a special occasion. In fact

especially when it’s not an occasion. That’s what makes it so valu-

able, the fact that there was no need to do it. It’s a free bonus.

You don’t need to spend money either. If you know what your

partner’s favourite wildflower is (You don’t? Why ever not? Go

and find out now), you can pick them the first one you see each

year. How lovely to be given the first snowdrop or bluebell or

foxglove of the year by someone who loves you.

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Or you might

do your partner a drawing, or bake them an unbirthday cake, or

leave a card on their pillow.

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Especially the chocolate – pralines for me please.

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From your own garden obviously. I know you shouldn’t pick endangered wild

flowers, or dig up whole plants from the wild.

RULE 59

125

R E L A T I O N S H I P R U L E S

You see, there are lots of things you can give your partner

because the important thing is to show that you were thinking of

them and to let them know that you love them enough to give

them a gift for no reason at all. The fact that you love them is

reason enough.

So when did you last give your partner a present? You’re not

allowed to count birthdays, Christmas, Valentine’s day or your

wedding anniversary. What was the last gift you gave them with-

out an occasion for it? If it was in the last week, well done. I

hope they appreciate you. If it was in the last month you’re

doing OK, but don’t you love them enough to give them some-

thing a bit more often? Aim for once a week or so, although you

need a bit of variation. If it becomes nothing but habit, it loses

its value. No point always buying them tatty carnations from the

petrol station every week when you fill up the car. If it was more

than a month ago, you need to give them something today –

hurry up, put the book down and go and sort it out now. If it

was more than three months ago, shame on you. Don’t read any

more Rules until you’ve acted on this one.

WHEN DID YOU LAST

GIVE YOUR PARTNER A

PRESENT?