Who or What Is Leading Your Life?
Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
—Leo Tolstoy
Who or what is leading your life? The approval of others? Pleasing your mother or father? Others’ expectations of you? Proving yourself to others? Maybe proving yourself to yourself?
This chapter is about taking on some deep work—the kind of work that needs to be done for us to be leaders in our lives. And we really mean being a leader in all aspects of our lives, including at work, in relationships, with family, with community, even with all of society. Warren Bennis captures this idea in the first few pages of his self-reflective book, An Invented Life. He writes, “I believe in self-invention, have to believe in it. ...

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