Chapter 6
Listen
Listening serves a far greater purpose than gathering information—it paves the way for you to be more influential. Listening requires adeptness at tuning in to others as well as expressing yourself on multiple levels. The payoff is a far greater likelihood of the other person listening to you.
This chapter explores empathetic listening in depth and introduces a tool—three-level listening—for putting it into practice. We also offer practical advice on how to listen masterfully in a variety of business settings, including one-on-one and group interactions.
In the business of advice-giving, recommendation-making, idea-offering, or selling, it is not enough to be right—you have to earn the right to be right. Others will listen to you, and be open to your advice, point of view, and perspective once they feel they have been fully heard and understood by you. Conversely, people will not accept what you are offering if they do not feel understood by you. You give others the experience of being heard and understood by listening. (See Chapter 3, “The Dynamics of Influence.”)
Here’s the problem, though: Most of the listening done in business today leaves a lot of room for improvement. What most of us have been taught about listening is far from sufficient when it comes to making a connection. By applying the techniques in this chapter, you will be able to listen and connect to partners in ways that build trust (Figure 6.1).
In the business of advice-giving, recommendation-making, ...
