The Unexpected Leader

1Making the Leadership Decision

Throughout our lives, we spend a significant amount of our time in a state of seeking approval and permission. Think about it—from asking permission to cross the street as a child to begging for a friend to stay the night, to school admissions processes, to securing a driver's license, to job interview opportunities to marriage licenses and passport approvals, we are constantly seeking approval to do things in our lives.

This chain of approvals that we seek starts early, usually with the teaching of the words and phrases “may I,” “can I,” and “please.” Not only are we seeking approval, but we've been conditioned to then wait a certain amount of time for the approval of whatever it is that we asked for to be granted.

It should be no surprise that this waiting behavior carries over into other parts of our lives, even when it's not necessary. While there are times in our lives when patience needs to be activated, intentionally used, and practiced, there are moments—important moments—when we must take ownership, decide, and move forward. But so often we don't.

And one of the many reasons why we wait for this permission (outside of just being conditioned to do so) is because it's often hard to resonate with being or stepping into something that isn't a reflection of who we are, who we think we are, or who we believe we could be.

I mean, if no one has told you that you are a leader, that you have leadership potential, or that you have the opportunity ...