Vertical Growth

3How values help us grow

‘Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that just looks good on the outside.’

Anonymous

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) defines values as, ‘chosen concepts linked with patterns of action that provide a sense of meaning that can coordinate our behaviour over long timeframes. Examples of such patterns might be acting lovingly towards one's partner or being present with one's children. Values in this sense can never be fulfilled, satisfied or completed. Rather, they serve to give us purpose, intent or direction for each instance of behaviour.⁹’

We simplify the definition as follows: ‘A virtue or value is a quality that, when cultivated, creates long-term connection, trust and harmony within us and in the environment or groups we live and work in.’

I emphasise long-term because sometimes following a value in the short term can be quite stressful. But if we follow it repeatedly, over time it develops deep trust and congruence within us. Ultimately, it gets us what we want, which is internal harmony as well as harmony in our families, teams, organisations and communities. Values help us achieve our highest potential.

Values, such as honesty, respect, curiosity, kindness, generosity and presence, were once expressed as ‘virtues’. The philosopher Marsilio Ficino, the father of the Italian Renaissance, asserted, ‘If you perfect one virtue, you perfect them all.’ What Ficino understood is that the process of perfecting a virtue is what ...