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13Negotiation

Successful negotiations start with stellar preparation

One of the many glitches in the human makeup is the difference in our abilities when it comes to performing for others as compared to how we perform for ourselves. It always baffles me to read about the psychiatrist who has helped so many of his patients rebuild their lives but whose own personal life is in turmoil. How about the financial adviser who never picked a stock right for himself but managed to build a tidy pile for his clients?

Not many of us are able to do things for ourselves the same way we do them for others. That translates into whether we’re better at our jobs or better at our personal affairs. Even people who make their livings negotiating can really mess up in the use of their professional skills in their own personal interests. Not every real estate expert who spends her career negotiating commercial retail leases is an expert when it comes to negotiating her own compensation. The insurance company adjuster who knocks heads all day long negotiating settlements with personal injury lawyers still may be a patsy in settling his own salary differences with his employer.

Unfortunately, there’s no way we can escape having to represent our own interests, whether we’re good at it or not. So we might as well try to learn how to be good at it. Whether or not you’ve ever negotiated anything else in your life, when it comes to getting a job, asking for a promotion or a raise, or even hanging onto ...