Imagine that you chime in with an opinion during a team discussion and suddenly there's a loud screeching noise and everyone goes silent, the lights dim, and a spotlight shines directly on you. That's what it can feel like when you speak up to say something that contradicts others, when you give tough feedback, or when you call out an elephant in the room.
If you're unfamiliar with the “elephant in the room” phrase, Wikipedia provides a useful definition: “a metaphorical idiom in English for an important or enormous topic, question, or controversial issue that is obvious or that everyone knows about but no one mentions or wants to discuss because it makes at least some of them uncomfortable or is personally, socially, or politically embarrassing, controversial, inflammatory, or dangerous.”90Wikipedia identifies the original source of the phrase as an 1814 fable by Ivan Krylov entitled “The Inquisitive Man,” about a man who notices all kinds of little things at a museum, but doesn't notice an elephant in the room.
It can be tough to call out an elephant, state a contradictory opinion, or offer feedback that may be hard to hear. It's often much easier to stay silent, to soften a conviction, to agree and go along with the crowd. Instead, we implore you, don't play “nice.” ...
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