The Way of the Wall Street Warrior

CHAPTER 1Get Primed for Entry-Level Cattle Calls: Clean Your House

You think you've been demeaned, disheartened, or even abused up to this point in your life? You ain't seen nothing yet. During the cattle call required to find an entry-level job, rejection can come faster than a blunt, “Better-Luck-Next-Time” four-word email. It's your first, startling indication that even getting your foot in the door will separate the plebes from the potentates.

The whole process of interviewing is ludicrous. If you do get hired, it's because you interview well, and not necessarily because you can do the work with any kind of competence. Interviews never made much sense to me because people perform differently in the field of play under the bright lights. Imagine signing a new quarterback through this process. He might give a great interview, but don't be surprised if on the first day of practice, the dude can't hit a moving target more than ten feet away. There's even a scientific explanation for it. It's called interviewer illusion, and it means the tendency for interviewers to overrate their own ability to interview and choose the best candidate. Who's the fool now?

But we're not here to break convention, at least not this one. This tried-and-true method probably dates all the way back to the Ice Age, when the first caveman asked his fellow hunter, “You do know how to kill a sabertooth, right?” Seconds before they were both mauled to death, he was probably thinking he should have done ...