Aftershock: Protect Yourself and Profit In The Next Global Financial Meltdown, Second Edition

Leave ’em Laughing

After reading some of the quotes from senior financial analysts and financial leaders you may be laughing or crying. But, to be sure you start the book with a little humor in an otherwise difficult situation; we thought we would close out the first chapter of the book with the following bit e-mailed to us by one of our supporters. It’s not ours, but we honestly don’t know who to give credit to. So, if someone knows who wrote this, e-mail or call us, and we’ll post it on our web site.

You Know It’s a Bad Economy When . . .

1. Your bank returns your check marked as “insufficient funds” and you have to call them and ask if they meant you or them.

2. The most highly paid job is now jury service.

3. People in Beverly Hills fire their nannies and are learning their children’s names.

4. McDonalds is selling the quarter-ouncer.

5. Obama met with small businesses—GE, Chrysler, Citigroup, and GM—to discuss the stimulus package.

6. Hot Wheels and Matchbox cars are now trading at higher prices than GM’s stock.

7. You got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

8. Your “reality check” bounced.

9. The stock market indexes have been renamed: the Dow is now the “Down-Jones” and the S&P is the “Substandard & Very Poor.”

10. Webster’s is keeping its dictionary length constant by adding words that are commonly used, such as Twitter, tweet, and Facebook, and dropping those no longer needed, such as retirement, pensions, and Social Security.

He Said What?!

In an appearance on ...